I need to figure things out. Seriously, I do.
I'm more confused than clear and I need some kind of fixed point, some kind of strategy.
Right now I live day by day and it's not good. It's a badly planned way of living and leads to confusion. I'm off three days from work and I plan to use these days to the max. Planning, organizing and making decisions. Cause I can't go on like this. It's fucked up.
I'm back in Stockholm after a lovely weekend with Sandra & Martina. It's always so nice to meet them, but now they have just moved to a great apartment in Gävle, big, light and with the cats running around and being a bit crazy. I'll be visiting them alot, I imagine.
I'm a bit tired, but in a good mood. I had a fantastic time, as always, and felt that I needed to see them.
You know how you sometimes feel a strong need to see specific people, it was like that for me with them.
The three of us went to mom and dad's grave today. It felt nice, just hadn't been there in a few years (I'm bad , I know) and when we got there it had some uncut grass and stuff to take care of. Felt so good to tend to the grave, a feeling I wasn't expecting.
Now I'm back in the chaos and back to every day life...
Or almost at least.
I'm not really about every day life now, just going from one day to the next. Drifting along in an ocean of hours and minutes. No need to be fixed or driven now, I'm just going along in life. In a flow that's supposed to bring some answers and some goals.
I don't know... I'm not too philosophical right now, so everything comes out like shit.
