Internal rage

I'm trying to decide if this has been a great day of writing or a lazy day for doing nothing but writing... At least I've enjoyed it. And it went by far too fast. Not that its over, but its way less productivity out
of this day than I was aming for. I need structure and I need a little bit of ass-kicking when I don't do what I'm supposed to. Not that theres anyone around to kick it...

This new home of mine irritates me. Or to be exact; my attitude about getting things done here irritates me. I have lost my balance. I expect things to be fixed and sorted before I even build a base for it to be fixed on.
I'm shit. More or less.
This month was supposed to be an adventure, but it's turning out to be a long wait for things to start happening.

And I now know that I hate the walls here. They are cement (or whatever it is), and any thing to be put up needs to be drilled. Wich means that I have to ask Peder, it sucks.
Can't wait until I made this place more livable.

Prison with spiders...

Im trapped in my home today, it's no joke.
There's a huge machine (a digging thing) that's neatly parked right across the only exitpoint... What to do? Not that I need to go anywhere, but it would be nice, in case of a fire or something. So I'm stuck here about to go bananas over the cage some worker so thoughtfully made my home...
What a day...
I guess I have to do with what I have and get going on the curtains I never manage to find time to make. Now I have no exuse at all I guess.

There are quite many spiders here, too many if you ask me. Any spider relocation center out there?

tour 2010

Decided to make my summer vacation next year all about live gigs. Nice theme i think. A bit personal and far better than anything else i can think of!

Nine Inch Nails & IKEA

These last few days have been a struggle.. things just keep fighting me all the way.
So I do what I always do, I find a good band and let the music swallow me whole. This time it was (to noones surprise) NIN that got the honor of being my anchor to sanity.
I spent too much time on YouTube and got myself a good laugh.

And this evening me and Peder won the great war against IKEA, which was takin place in my basement kingdom, and will forever be remembered as "the day mankind won over the LACK-shelves".
But as soon as we got them up, I realised I do not have all that much to put on them yet... So I'm gonna invest in some beautiful books, perhaps frame a photo (got one particular in mind) and just let the shelves grow more and more personal with time.

Stress

It's taking way to long (not really, i'm just very impatient) to get my new home ready. I want it all right now! It feels like every day i want something to happen. And every day i feel like nothing gets done... is it gonna take forever? Am i too hard on myself?
I know it's just been 6 days since i moved in, but i didn't get done what i should have gotten done. I spent money on things that couldn't wait, that i hadn't calculated... shit, filling new space from scratch isn't a quick and definately not a cheap thing to do!

Life is moving in such a slow pace, some days is feels like it's standing still... today is such a day. I can hear people outside, getting things done and living their little lives. I envy their simplicity, days are predictable and in a comfortable rutine.

I need to do so much (on so many levels) that i end up just feeling like i'm doing nothing. Even though i am doing plenty!

the beginning

Fall turns to winter and the first snow came a few days ago. Got time now to do the usual winter-reflection.
Not that i have that much new... just time to think without the usual cloudy mind.